|Mom and my Birthday Boy|
This all changed for me the year my Mother passed away. I thought I was doing fine. I planned a low key family gathering...I didn't want my kids to feel they had lost both their Gramma and Momma at the same time. What I wasn't expecting was the full blown, knock me to my knees feeling I had when I turned the corner in the grocery store and landed on the card aisle. I had stayed away from all the Hallmark Stores, but completely forgot the grocery stores now have card/party aisles. It hit me in my heart that I would never again have 'my' Mom to send a card to, call on the phone, take to lunch...all the fun things we would do to celebrate 'Mom'. I left the grocery cart right there in the aisle praying I could keep the tears hidden until I was alone in the car.
My Dad died in October...four months later my Mom died. It is an understatement to say it was a very hard time in my life. They had evacuated here after hurricane Katrina flooded the Assisted Living facility where they lived in New Orleans. We weren't able to bury either of them in the cemetery in New Orleans until the month after my Mom died. The cemeteries were busy trying to repair the flood damage. So, although Mom died in March of that year, we had a memorial service for them in April. And yes...Mother's Day is May.
My son's birthday is on Mother's Day this year. I will joyously celebrate his birth and the privilege of being mother to my five children. As many of our children and grandchildren that are able to make it to a luncheon will be there. We will be happy, but tucked in my heart will be the missing piece of the day...my Mom.
I know I am not alone in having to face Mother's Day without my Mother's physical presence. For those who are facing this whether for the first or after many years, I send you my love and empathy. As a Mother myself...I know we are meant to enjoy the day; I know without a doubt my Mom would want me to celebrate the day. Still, I will keep that place in my heart and find a quiet time in the day to remember...